Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Kiss & Tell

Kissing is said to be a great way to express love.

I have friends who until today (they are over 20 now), who would still kiss their mother, which I find extremely hot. (I am a Cancerian. I'll always be attracted to people who love their mother.) Of course, I'm not referring to French-kissing, you moron! I'm talking about those pecks on the cheek or on the hands thing.

Listening to a radio show, Kidder (host) told his co-host that he would do anything the wife wanted him to do, even if it means having to go down on another guy or having sex with him. But that's all he is willing to do. If she asks him to kiss the guy, he would flip. Now, this is a straight guy who is very man about his sexuality and is certainly not bi. He is willing to suck another guy and have sex with another guy, but not kiss him?! Correct me if I'm wrong, but ain't the sucking worse than the kissing?

Talking to a few straight male friends of mine, while some screamed no, some gave me the same answer. It's ok for them to have sex with another man but it's not ok for them if the guy wanted them to kiss. What the...?! Since I'm someone who wouldn't do any of those with another who is not my boyfriend, I really don't know what it's like. But the way I see it, since you're already having the person's phallus down your throat, what's a little kiss going to hurt? I really don't get it.

Enlighten me, please!

- jessism © 11082007 -

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Sex: Smegma

(Disclaimer: Jess is famous for posting weird/gross topics, this is one of them. Feel free to NOT read this posting if, by reading the very obvious title, you feel that you will feel offended by the content. The author will NOT be responsible for any mental scarring left behind by this posting.)

I hate to admit this, but I do have a case of mysophobia. I can get disgusted easily by a lot of things.

Talking to a friend online, the guy was telling me a disgusting experience he had when he decided to go down on his girlfriend. Instead of a clean crotch, dude came across a white substance that I block the rest of the details after that out, in order to not puke my breakfast back out.

When it comes to him asking me about my biggest turn off in sex, the only thing I can think of is the word: "smegma".

Bad breath can be easily overcome. Though I may NOT French-kiss you, normal kissing which doesn't involve my tongue going into somewhere that stinks is still fine with me. But smegma?! Ugrh!!! Just the thought of it is enough to make me wanna slap the person... Ok, puke first, then slap the person when I regain my strength. ( Thank god, my ex is cut...)

It's not just a matter of personal hygine but also a matter of something known as: RESPECT! Don't ever go out with a dick that stings with the smell and contain traces of smegma!! PLEASE!!! You'll never know when you might end up getting laid! If you don't give a damn about your personal hygiene, consider it a form of respect for the other person. Wash your dick!!

For those of you who are oh-so-innocent and doesn't know what smegma is, it is a yellowish cheesy substance that can usually be found under the penis head of certain uncircumcised male, that thing also carries a very very very very bad odor! Also known as "cheese" in laymen's term, smegma, dare I emphasize, is an indication of poor bad extremely bad personal hygiene!!! I know there are probably some minority out there who has certain fetish towards this disgusting substance, I don't. I just find it extremely disgusting.

For the curious bunch of you out there who are yet to be grossed out by this posting, feel free to click on this link for an image of what smegma looks like. (WARNING: Gross disturbing visual within…)

What about the rest of you out there? Anyone who actually encountered this disturbing/disgusting thingy and is still alive to tell the tale?

(For more information on uncircumcised penis health, please consult your family doctor.)

- jessism © 18102007 -

Sex: Hickey

I was very close to stop posting these sex-related topics, but I really can't help it. There are people out there who need to be educated!!! Here's what happened:

Returning from my long Raya holiday, while having a conversation with 魔鬼鱼, I found out that she does not know how a hickey came to be. Her idea was to bite the person until the desired bruising effect is achieved. I dunno what gave her that weird idea, or where she heard it from, but it sure is scary!

Those who know me would know that jess is very very very very much afraid of pain. To let someone bite me until it bruises is just not my idea of sexual fun! I love hickies, giving them or receiving them, but if there's any truth in having to be bitten until I bruise, trust me, I'd whack the shit out of the fucker who bites me before anything else! When I heard of how 魔鬼鱼 thought that hickies came to be, you can imagine the horrified look on my face! I knew that I have to do something about it before she actually hurts someone!

(At the same time, I can already imagine the doctor sniggering away as he/she treats the wound on the poor soul she bit...)

For those of you who have no friggin' idea how a hickey came to be, it is NOT from biting!!!! What you do is you put your lips against the side of their neck, or wherever you wanted the hickey to be, as if you're kissing them, leave your mouth slightly open and suck! The key is to suck on the skin... NOT bite! This will usually take not more than 15 seconds for the hickey to appear... that is unless, your sucking skill is really that bad... (I refuse to comment further on that...)

Like any bruise on your body, a hickey should be gone in a few days time, as hickies are caused by broken vessels beneath the skin - exactly like a bruise lah! If you still have no idea what I'm talking about, please do Google the word "hickey" before you go around biting people!

PS: 魔鬼鱼, if you're reading this, remember: DO NOT BITE!!! SUCK!!! - No pun intended.

- jessism © 18102007 -