The One Where I Kissed Steven

Before you even ask: Steven is NOT my new boyfriend. The Steven that I am referring to is the former Boy'z member (current Sun Boy'z member), Steven Cheung. And yes, I kissed him! Jealous leh... Hehe....

Went to Sungei Wang to have one last K-session with Irene, Puay Yin, 24 and Ang Ku Kuih before we all head home for Chinese New Year (CNY). After our K-session, Irene, who still hasn't buy her CNY clothes, said she wanted to walk around, so the four of us accompanied her. While walking, I heard the latest Sun Boy'z song playing on air, so I started telling Irene about their new Mandarin album, where most of their Cantonese songs were rewritten and sung in Mandarin - think Christina Aguilera with her "Mi Reflejo" album. Although I know she didn't really care much, but hey, it's Kenny Kwan's ex-group, so I carried on rambling to her about Sun Boy'z. Can't believe, that monkey, Steven, is still there.

Anyways, as we walk we noticed a huge crowd down at the concourse. Well guess what? Apparently SunBoy'z will be having an autograph session at Sungei Wang!!! Talk about coincidence! Since I already bought my CNY clothes when I was in HK, I asked them to go on and I went for the autograph session.

The boys came out around 2.45pm and performed First Date, the first single from their latest album, and then it's game time! The boys were told by the MC to pick out six participants from the crowd, of any gender. Dennis and William, who went first each picked two girls. When it came to Steven, the MC suddenly said, "you need to pick at least one guy." When Steven asked if any guys wanted to go up on stage -- NO, I did not put up my hand immediately -- everyone just looked at everyone blankly. Nobody put up their hand. Since no one wanna go, I put up my hand... and I was picked.

When all six of us got up on stage, the game was revealed to us: We are to play Rock, Paper, Scissor with the person who picked us. The WINNER will get a KISS from the LOSER. Immediately I turn to Steven, who is standing next to me, "You've got to be kicking yourself for picking me now." The dude smiled and says, "Nah... Don't worry about it."

More about the game was revealed, the LOSER will have to kiss any part of the winner's body, according to what is stated in a sealed card picked by the winner. Oh great.... I wonder if "lips" is written on the MC's card?

Dennis went first and he won, the card he picked says "ear". So the girl he picked kissed his ear. Dennis blushed!!! Oh my gawd! So cute!!! Hahaha... Then William won was well, the card he picked says "head". The girl he picked kissed him on the head. Then it's Steven's turn, I was about to let the girl Steven picked go first when the MC suddenly say, why don't we let the guy go first? Shitz!

As Steven and I prepare to go, we caught Dennis and William running up with the MC, whispering to him, and the two suddenly decide that we should skip the Rock, Paper, Scissor thingy and just kiss. Dennis even said to Steven, "You have to let him kiss your lips!" I thought Steven was going to object, but he said: "Why don't we up it a little? We'll do a French kiss, with all the tongue action. How's that?!" The crowd went wild; I went into shock. I get to French Steven?! Dennis came up to me and said, "Don't worry, you already got his approval! Go for it!" Before we knew it, Dennis, William and Steven started horsing around on stage as if the rest of us don’t exist. It was fun to watch. But shitz!! At the time, all I could think of was: "Steven wants me to French him?!"

The MC stepped in after awhile and asked us to get back to the game. Ok... no suspense here. I lost.

I have to say, each time I meet one of those Boy'z member, something gay happens. When I met Kenny Kwan five months ago, I went on stage and was asked to tell him that I love him in public. And now, I am supposed to kiss Steven? In public?!

Steven picked a card and it says: "nose". Damn! I was kinda hoping for something else! Suddenly William walks up to remind me, "Since Steven said he wanted some tongue action, now you will have to lick his nose." Eeeeeewwwwwwwwww!!!! Steven looked at me and says, "Don't worry. Although I haven't bathed for three days, I do wash my face. But with all the sweating going on, it's gonna taste salty." Ha-Ha... very funny, Steven.

I can see the journalists below are all ready with their cameras, waiting for me to give them a newsworthy picture! Steven wiped the sweat on his face off, and asked, "You ready?" I nodded. Steven had his eyes closed and waited. Ok, I know this is NOT my first time kissing a guy. But fuck wei!!! Doing it in public? Some more with a celebrity?! Oh, to hell with it! I leaned in, closed my eyes and went for it.

I know what you're thinking: No, I did not lick his nose! Ewww! I really kissed him, on the nose.

I didn't mean to be rude, or anything, but the minute my lips touched his nose, my first reaction was to back off. It's wet!!! Gross!! I bounced back and started wiping my lips with the back of my hands. Sorry, Steven. I didn't mean to be rude. It's just my mysophobia kicking in. The crowd cheered. I just wanna dig a hole and hide. How can I be so rude?!

There were no winners for the game session. All six of us received a copy of Sun Boy'z's latest CD, a poster and a notepad, which I managed to get them to autograph in the end. But who cares about all that anyway? I get to kiss Steven! That's all that matters! Haha...

- jessism © 27012008 -

The One About Windows Vista

After months of getting stuck with something I didn't want in the first place. I am now proud to present you all with my review of the infamous Windows Vista!

First of all, let me start by saying that I hate Windows. I really truly do. It's filled with viruses and backdoor trojans, and the privacy issue! (I bet some of you out there still don't know that Windows actually does that!) And let's not forget the force download of its Windows Update. (They automatically download god-knows-what-shit that takes up a lot of memory space, installed it without your knowledge, and then ask you to restart your pc.)

I was never a fan of Windows. But I have no choice because all PCs out there uses Windows and the amount of programs written for Windows is much higher than for any other operating systems. (Of course, that was then. Now there are tons of software out there for all sorts of OSes)

When Windows releases Windows ME, it was no doubt the worse OS ever written in computer history. It crashes all the time, your PC hangs, etc. So when XP was released, it became an instant hit: faster start-up time, more stable than and pretty user friendly too! With XP being so useful, I really don't see why Windows wanna fuck things up by releasing another crap OS. This time it came in the form of Windows Vista.

Vista. Even before it was released, people out there are already making a lot of noise. For exmaple: It is a rip off of Apple OS' user interface, and how Vista is a demanding motherfucker! For those of you who are so blur and haven't noticed this, Windows Vista actually requires at least 1 GB of system memory (which a lot of gamers are going: 'what the fuck?!') and a 40GB hard drive with at least 15 GB of available space (do you know how much porn you can store with that amount of memory space?) With those absurd requirements, a lot of people, when purchasing their PC, would request the dealers to install Windows XP for them rather than Vista. But as all of you know, all new PC now automatically comes with Windows Vista. Since I see no good reason for me to move away from XP, when I went wanted to purchase my VAIO months back, I told the daeler that I wanted XP installed into my PC. It was then that I found out that if I downgrade the OS to XP, it would void my warranty. Great, so now Windows have to resort to threat in order to get people to use their OS?!

Fine. If that's the case, I guess I'll just have to cope with it for a year, right?

The minute I got home and start up my pc, I noticed that the OS actually takes up fuck load of my computer's memory space! And now, after months of getting stuck with something I didn't want in the first place, here's my verdict:

1. The start up time is no doubt slower than XP. No biggie there, all you need to do is wait an extra minute.

2. The requirement of "40GB hard drive with at least 15GB of available space" is no joke. If you partition the drive into two, you would notice that the minimum you need to have for the drive hosting your Vista OS is 55GB. The reason is because Vista hogs up 40GB of the memory space, and since it needs ANOTHER 15GB free space: 40GB + 15GB = 55GB! But there's more...

Since normal computer comes with not much software installed, your 120GB drive which is partitioned in two would now have about: 55GB on Drive C and about 50GB in Drive X. (Just a rough estimation as some system files eats up the rest of the remaining memory space.) Okay, so you got a new pc with no software, what do you do? Install new software!

3. New software takes up space. And remember the requirement of Vista? It needs 55GB! Anytime that your memory space on the drive hosting Vista drops below "15 GB of available space", ladies and gentlemen, your computer will slow down. And when I say slow, I mean drastically slow. Something that you can notice the obvious difference! So what can you do now? You will need to install the new programs in Drive X, which means, lesser working memory space for you to use! But it gets more interesting.

4. All PC have something call "antivirus". As Vista needs 1GB RAM to function NORMALLY. Everytime your antivirus starts doing a full system scan, you can't do anything else. Your computer wil slow down even more obviously now. (Response time drop from the usual almost-instant to wait-at-least-15-seconds.) Worse part is, you can't stop the virus scan like how you can do it in XP, because Vista hides the scanner, thus making it compulsory to scan your entire PC and impossible to shut the scanner down. In other words, you lose control of your PC!

But that's not the only thing you lose control of! As I mentioned earlier, with XP, you already loses control over your privacy info. Your OS is set to automatically send out information about your PC usage to Microsoft and it automatically downloads god-knows-what-shit that takes up a lot of memory space, installed it without your knowledge, and then ask you to restart your pc. With Vista it's the same deal but with a difference.

5. With every update, you can see what is available for update if you choose the manual update. But even those updates you DO NOT select, or choose to ignore, if Microsoft thinks it's important, they will still install it into your pc even if you say no! (Showing you that they own your PC now. Not you!)

6. Oh wait, remember the memory space thingy in Item 2 and 3? If in the event that after your updates, your partitioned Drive C has less than 15GB free space, your computer would slow down! So now, after the update, you will need to move more free space back into Drive C! Yay! Lesser memory space for the user!

If even after all those things I've said, you still think that Windows Vista is good, wait till you hear this.

7. For so many years of PC usage, I have never experienced this. Maybe it's because I never came into contact with Windows ME. I've heard and learned about this when I was studying Computer Science in college but never have I experienced it. After less than 4 months of using Windows Vista, I finally met the Blue Screen of Death! Not once, but twice!!!

For those of you who don't know what the heck that is, Blue Screen of Death (or BSoD) is where a stop error screen that appears when an OS, most frequently and notably Windows, encounters what is said to be a critical system error which can cause the system to shut down to prevent damage. If you look the definition up in Wikipedia, you will find that BSoD is usually caused by "poorly written device drivers, faulty memory, a corrupt registry, or an incompatible Dynamic-link library (DLL)" and that the BSoD have been present in ALL Windows-based operating systems since Windows 3.1! That's how stable and well-written Windows is!

Conclusion: If you DON'T like to be in control of your PC and like to be boss around by your OS, get Windows Vista! If you like to have a PC that house ONLY your OS and nothing else, get Windows Vista! If you like to experience the Blue Screen of Death, get Windows Vista! If you like to be in control of your PC, make full use of your computer's memory space and NOT experience any stop error, get Linux!

- jessism © 26012008 -

The One With The Plumbing Job

This is the reason why gay men can't be plumber: We suck! (No pun intended.)

The pipe in my bathroom has been leaking for months. It's getting so bad lately that the water actually seeps into the room next to my bathroom, leaving a water-mark so scarily hideous it makes the water-mark effects in "Dark Water" look like kindergarten school work.

My housemate proceeds to find a plumber to check out the problem two days ago and the plumber, who seem to be in a rush to get out of our house and not fix the leak, told us that we can solve the problem just by buying some white flimsy tape-majig and just do a little DIY ourselves and the leak will magically disappear. I was happy, because:
A) My housemate told me we have the white flimsy tape-majig (whatever you call those things.)
B) The plumber didn't charge us any consultation fee (Yes, I'm very poor now, so not having to pay for anything is like music to my ears.)

So this morning when I wake, I found the tape-majig that my housemate left for me - hanging on my room's doorknob. Since I was out for the rest of the day and got home at 2.30am, I decided that it's time to work the macho-manly side of me and fix the leak myself.

I took the tape, went into the bathroom, shut the water main, and took the tap head out. Yes, it was just like the plumber told us, the old white flimsy tape-majig can barely be seen on the tap head. Now according to this "expert", all I need to do is to wrap a few layers of tape on the tap head, screw the thing back, and the leak would stop.

There I was at 2.45am in the morning, working away, wrapping the white flimsy tape-majig onto the tap head. And before I knew it -- No, I didn't finish the work -- I kinda finished the tape! LOL...
I thought to myself: "Maybe this will work." So I went into the washroom and screw the thing back, tightly into its place, turned the water main on, and check the leak.

"Wow, I did it! I actually got it fixed!"

Not long after that I started hearing a hissing sound and I went in for a closer look: water is actually seeping out and the volume is increasing by the minute! I quickly turn the water main off and wanted to unscrew the thing. The minute I touched the tap head, guess what? The whole thing fell off!!!! The fucking thing just broke in two!!! The first thing that crossed my mind was: "HOLY SHIT!!!"

And then, after a few seconds brain-lag: "Lucky I had the water main switched off just in time before the tap went flying straight into my face!"

I then went out to find a screwdriver, and slowly, I unscrew the part that was left in the pipe and took it out. (See pix below:)
Now, instead of a small leak, my bathroom now has a hole in the wall and NO water supply, as I have to keep the main completely turned off to avoid a major flood in my room.
Morale Of This Story: Never get a gay guy to do a straight man's work. It can only spell disaster.

- jessism © 07012008 -

The One With Bak Kut Teh

Everytime I post a blog about how much my cousin sister can eat, nobody believes me. This evening, her friend and a couple of the bak kut teh shop waiters can be my witness. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP!

Went to the Jalan Ipoh bak kut teh place this evening with Irene and Puay Yin, who wanted to try the bak kut teh that I've been raving about.

Now normally, if three person goes for bak kut teh there, they would order for two person instead of three cos they might end up with too much food on the table and unable to finish in the end. So when the waiter came over to our table this evening, I look straight at him in the eye and went: "Bak kut teh sam gor wai!!" ("Bak kut teh for three person.") The guy look at the two girls beside me and asked: "Gei dor gor wai?" ("For how many person?")

"Sam gor," I replied, and he took off even without asking if I wanted any veg to go with the bak kut teh. Irene and I started screaming at the guy, wanting him to come back. We told him we're not finished ordering yet. And I repeated my order earlier together with what else we wanted to go with the bak kut teh: "Yat gor bak kut teh, yat gor yau choi, yat gor yau char kuai, yat gor tau pok, sam gor wai." ("One bak kut teh, one steamed vegetable, one bowl of yau char kuai and a bowl of tau pok for three person.")

As he took our orders, he kept looking at the girls for approval. You can see Irene nodding away and Puay Yin said, "Ok ar..." I bet at this point he must be thinking that we're a bunch of weirdos who's never tasted bak kut teh before!

After awhile, our steammed vegetable arrived, then came the yau char kuai, then the tau pok, but no rice. I immediately call for the waiter and asked for rice. His reaction was: "Yat gor fan?" ("One rice?")

"Sam gor." ("Three.")

At this point, I think the waiter is just too lazy to argue with me. Then the bak kut teh came. All three of us instantly stopped talking and dug in. Nobody said anything much, except for: "Itadakimase" and "be careful, it's hot."

Within 30 minutes we cleared all the food on the table and the whole giant bowl of bak kut teh. Leaving it dry, with not a drop of soup left. Irene and I even shared an extra bowl of rice!

All of us were so full! All we can think of was: go home and sleep. (Yes, we're a bunch of pigs.)

As we waited for the waiter to get us the bill, I told Irene that they sell cut fruits here as well. She looked past me and towards the fruit counter behind me, and I knew what she wanted -- mango! Now this was at a point that we are so stuffed up we could explode and all she can think of (apart from going home to sleep) is: Mango!

Another waiter came to check on what we ate. "Bak kut teh liong gor wai?" (Bak kut teh for two person?") We looked at him and went: "Sam gor!"

You can see the disbelieve look on his face when he heard our answer. Normally, these guys wouldn't ask what you had, because they already know. But looking at the empty bowls on our table and refusing to believe that one skinny guy and two small-sized girls can eat so much, he proceeded to ask us what we had and we repeated the order for him. Finally, he gave us the bill.

While waiting for him to come back with the change, I went up to the fruit counter to pick out the mango for Irene. The guy who came back with the change saw me and came to my assistant. He took out the biggest packet they have there and passed it to me. I guess he finally realised that these three weirdos can really eat? :P

- jessism © 04012008 -

想/忘

今天回到了我們最後一起共用晚餐的地點。。。不知不覺的又想起了和你在一起的日子。

那一天，你忽然說要請我去那吃晚飯，而且還說搬出之前原本想好好的請我吃一餐，但薪水也不是很夠用，唯有選了那。我看得出你是在忍著淚，我也沒多說幾句的。那時，可以看得出你很不開心，但我也沒想那麼多，只以為你是捨不得搬離我.

飯後，雖然我們都吃得很飽，但貪吃的我們卻還買了兩大包水果，有說有笑，邊走邊吃的回到停車場。回到了車上，車還沒開兩人就靜了下來，在車裡掉起淚，哭了一場。可能大家都心裡有數,知道下去會有甚麼進展吧?

回到家時，可見你是有好多好多話想和我說卻說不出口。。。看著你一幅不開心的樣子，我心都碎了，我也沒追問下去。那晚抱著你睡時，我知道你哭了，但我卻甚麼也沒說。只在你背後默默的流淚，不想讓你知道，怕你難過。

回家的路上，周杰倫從收音機裡唱出了我的心聲：

不知不覺你已經離開我，不知不覺我跟了這節奏
後知後覺又過了一個秋，後知後覺我該好好生活

雖然和自己講了很多遍，時時刻刻的在說服自己；但是現在卻發現，原來想忘記真的不是一件很簡單的事！

愛情走的太快就像龍捲風，不能承受我已無處可躲
我不要再想，我不要再想，我不，我不，我不要再想你。。。

－忘不了的小狗 © 04012008－

3 Years!

I can't believe that it's been more than 3 years~!

When I first started "blogging" in 2005, I never thought that my blog site would be so successful. Not that I've become famous, or anything like that, but successful in a sense that there are actually people who reads my blog!!

When I started with my first posting, I thought to myself: Who's gonna read about the latest shit that happened to me?! They've got their own problems that needs to be settled. Why bother with mine? Well, I guess I was wrong. There are people who not only reads, but also wrote in via emails! (Thank you all, you know who you are.)

It really is great to see that the readership has grown from my expected zero readership to God-knows-how-many-there-are-out-there-right-now. Thank you all for paying attention to the not-so-interesting going-ons in my life. I really appreciate it lots~!

Although I was telling some of my friends that I wanted something different in 2008, blog-wise there ain't gonna be much difference. You guys will still be fed with the same boring jessism, and hopefully this year I will be able to write more happy stuff rather than the same old sappy stories I've written for 2007.

This year, I have added a list of Celebrity Bloggers into the right sidebar. Do visit them if or when you have the time, these people write kickass blogs! (My personal favourite is Jim Verraros' blog, go check it out!) If you know of any interesting celebrity bloggers' blog site that you wish to share with me, do email them over to gambit-3@lycos.com. I might just add them into the sidebar as well. ;)

Well, that's all for now. Happy new year, peeps! May this year be a great one for all~!

- jessism © 31122007-