Thursday, October 20, 2005

Cracking DaVinci's Crap: A Jessism


Was watching a National Geographic Special call "Unlocking DaVinci's Code". The 2-hour special was more of like a research on the so-called facts contained in Dan Brown’s novel "The DaVinci Code".

For those of you who haven't read the novel, like me, the book tells a supposedly fictionalized story about a secret code left by genius painter Leonardo DaVinci in his paintings. A lot of people who managed to decipher the code were killed and the book takes you to a lot of so-called legendary places around to world to crack what the secret is.

According to the National Geographic Special, the secret has something to do with Jesus being married to Mary. And that she was His wife, and they had a child, which carries the bloodline of Christ. Also something about why the Christian Church back then burnt the scriptures of the rest of the Jesus' apostle and only leaving those they that thought were the "right" depiction of Christ.

The way I see it: Leave the poor guy alone! He's already been nailed to a tree (or something like that) and long gone for centuries! Whether He is married, or not, is none of your god damn business! Couldn't you guys give the fella some privacy and leave Him alone?

For you so-called "thinkers" out there who like so much to "think" here's something that you to think about:

1. Have you ever thought that Jesus was maybe bisexual? I mean, c'mon… think about it. He's got 12 whatever-you-call-them who followed Him closely for no reasons, and when Mary shows up, they started to get all jealous of her. If they don't have anything "intimate" going on, then what's with the jealousy?

2. Maybe the gospel written by the other whatever-you-call-them were burnt because they actually say something about Jesus that made Him seem "human", such as throwing stones at birds, fishing, or maybe one of them actually saw Him jerked off, or went to a red light district?

3. The picture of "The Last Supper" drawn by DaVinci. Maybe the person on the right of Jesus is Mary. The reason why there are 11 of His men there was because He didn't invite the person that was going to betray Him to the event of the night?

4. As to why the knights of King Arthur were so rich: Maybe they did something that the Christian Church didn't manage to burn away. And they use that to blackmail the church, then the church got pissed, so they decided that it's time for the oh-so-holy knights to go to hell?

5. Have you ever thought that maybe Jesus would like you all to leave Him alone and stop prying into His private life? For all we know He could be gay and the reason He didn't marry was because He was in love with one (or all) of the 12 men that kept following Him.

6. If you have so much time on your hand to think about non-sense like this to prove that Christ is married, why don't you use the time to do some good for the world like strive for world peace, or something like that.

Once again, the whole point of this attempt of a blog is to say that: The poor dude's been dead for donkey years. It's time for you guys to leave Him alone and stop prying into His life. Whether He's married, or not, that's His personal life. Give Him some privacy for goodness' sake!

2 comments:

LMF said...

goodness. u gonna me alot of followers to be angry with u.

heheh

Anonymous said...

it is quite holy of you empathise with Jesus. I mean you actually care for the `man'to say say something good on his behalf to the prying fellows. perhaps your empathy is a sign of great life purpose to come. Your frustration is merely a reflection of an ongoing denial of your purpose in life. or Maybe you just want to side the underdog, in this case you perceived Jesus to be. But then, he said he is the son of god. Misplaced sympathy?